TTC#1

Posted by sunflower07 (314 days ago)

Hi all, I have been keeping track of the threads on this part of the site for a while and finally decided to register. I thought of initiating a thread for those who are trying for their very first time. I have been trying since last March and I have tried it all - taking it easy, going on a vaccation, clomid, tests, you name it. Every month just revolves around timing, testing, getting down to business, waiting and being disappointed. Hope is such a good thing and see it destroyed, so very devastating. Seeing children in prams, friends who tell me their unplanned 'accidents', and all those yearnings to be a mother... I think all those who have been there will understand. And yet, what is worse is you have to go about being brave about it and except for waiting for your turn to come, there is no other answer to it. Just wanted to meet all those who are in the same boat as I am. Ho hum!!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by lovechild (314 days ago)

Hi SF07,
I regularly follow the inputs from the other ladies on TTC#2 and the IVF thread.I am so dissapointed as we started trying 7 months back and every month has been one dissapointment after another.I always thought getting pregnant would be the easiest thing of all.....ha!.Well!!!!happy to have someone on TTC#1,happy to have inputs from the ladies on TTC#2as well as i have followed their advice on Korean Red Ginseng Tea(for DH),Robutissin(for me),etc...

I am currently on the last few days before AF arrives.No symptoms.And we did miss my O day ,only doing the BD before and after.2wice in all ,so not sure if if it was right.

Good luck 2 u as well.All i can say is ,you are not alone.Now,suddenly i am finding happiness and being less stressed about the baby making duties as i figure GOD HAS a plan for us and we just have to wait for that.So keep the hopes up and most imptly have fun!!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by sunflower07 (313 days ago)

Hi Lovechild, so nice to meet you online. Wish you the very best and fingers crossed for success this time. That two week wait is killing isn't it, especially at the time one nears AF's visit. My mind for one can't stop thinking. I work full time and even then I can't help thinking. Imagine being preoccupied with this for the last 17 months. I just don't recognise myself anymore - I feel like a woman possessed. Are you on clomid as well? Can you share your experiences with it such as CM, PCOS or any symptoms, period cycles etc? Signing off with many best wishes. sunflower

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by lovechild (313 days ago)

Hi SF07,
Bad news already.I did have some spotting already and it's only day 25,but i'm sure the full on AF will arrive by 2mrrw or so.I'm very regular with my cycle(28 days),but since we started trying my cycle has been anything from 25 day-29day cycle.The doc said it was ok.

I do have 5 fibroids(some q.big)but as of now the doc said it's ok to continue trying naturally for a few more months and then we'll see.I usually rely on the OPK's as suggested by the other ladies,it is a bit expensive ,but then it's a sure (sort of)way of knowing.I am not on Clomid yet.

Well!i'm already gearing up for the next cycle.
nice having some release online with other nice people like you who are in the same boat.lots and lots of baby dust to you.
LC

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Petie (313 days ago)

Hi!

I'm so glad this thread got started! I have been reading the other ones for so long too.
We have been trying for about a year and I completely understand what you mean about the disappointment each month and hating seeing babies and learning about friends' 'accidents'. :(
SF07, can you tell me more about clomid? When did you start it? I am thinking about going back to the Dr after this month's AF (so sure it will come!), so want to know the facts.
Petie
x

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by sunflower07 (312 days ago)

Hiya Lovechild, Hiya Petie, I feel so nice to know you and share my experiences and frustrations with you both. So sorry to hear about the onset of your next cycle Lovechild. The cycles have been wierd with me as well dear, so I just tell myself, nature is doing something for me. I too have a fibroid and a chocolate cyst and it bothers me more than the docs. They say many get pregnant with them. Petie clomid helped me get pregnant a few months ago which led to miscarriage. This is my second cycle. I started last Sep for four times before getting pregnant. This is my 4th cycle once again. The problem with clomid is you get so damn dry. I will be seeing the doc to do something about it. Thank you both so much for logging on. It is so nice to have company and feel you are not alone. Lots of best wishes to you both as well. SF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Starbucks2 (312 days ago)

Hiyah ladies. I am a TTC1'er as well but have been contributing more to the TTC2 thread. Having had some trauma with the last pregnancy (and I know I am not alone here) I am pleased to confirm that I tested positive over the weekend so hope this little one sticks around with no complications (although very early days). Good luck to all those TTC'ing this month or in the 2 week wait. I know how frustrating and anxious that period of time can be.

Best wishes
SB2

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Havefaith (312 days ago)

Dear All,

I am also a TTC 1'er. I have been on the TTC 2 (and others). It's a great idea to start a TTC thread.

Take care + lots of babydust to you all!

Havefaith

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by sunflower07 (312 days ago)

Congratulations Starbucks and the very best with your pregnancy. I have been pregnant as well before and lost it after 2 months. I am so glad for you. Will you be able to tell me how far apart was your m/c and the recent good news? I know it may not be the same for me, but it will still give me some hope.
Havefaith, your pseudonym already gives me hope. How long have you been trying? Gotta have faith hey? There is no other answer to what we are trying to achieve. I fervently hope that you are successful soon. SF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Havefaith (312 days ago)

SF,

Thank you - that's very kind of you. I did come up with my pseudonym to give myself and others hope.

We started trying about 1.5 years ago - got pregnant last July and then had a m/c (blighted ovum) last Sept. Been seeing Dr. Ho since Feb this year.

Someone once told me that TTC is like being on a plane full of people that got stranded somewhere -as each flight leaves they manage to get a few people on the plane from the stranded flight - you just dont know when it will be your turn - you just keep on waiting. You just dont want to be the last one left.

Take care! Lets pray for each other and everyone else who is TTC.

Havefaith

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Starbucks2 (312 days ago)

Hi Sunflower and thanks for the kind wishes. We lost a baby at 20 weeks along. I was at the quietly confident stage having made it past the 12 week mark so was even more of a shock being told of the news at the 20 weeks scan. We had only just started to feel her kick. That was in February this year and took my body a few months to recover. This was the third month of trying again so I think that we are very lucky. I am of course worried sick about the next 16 weeks to reach my (new) psychological goal of 20 weeks but as all on this forum say, I am trying to keep positive and allow myself a little excitement

All the best and lots of baby dust to you, Havefaith and all others who are trying

SB2

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by sunflower07 (312 days ago)

Hey havefaith, I too had a blighted ovum and yours and my journey seems similar in some way. I do hope that you get on that flight ahead of me as I feel you deserve to. Will pray for you and will continue to have faith.
SB2, I don't even know what to say to you. It must have been so gutting. I hope it all goes well for you. Why such things ever occur and why it is you to face that and what you are ever meant to realise in the long run - god only knows. But my! when such things happen, it is such a severe blow. I am happy your recent pregnancy occured quite quickly. Our best wishes are with you. SF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Havefaith (312 days ago)

SF,

Thank you for your really kind wish. When I had the blighted ovum last year - I cried really hard but told myself that may be someone else wants a baby more than me and her baby took my baby's chance - which was OK with me. When I told my OB that - she thought I was nuts.

I hope we get on the flight together and have seats next to each other.

Take care,
HF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by sunflower07 (312 days ago)

Oooh even better! Will change my prayers for that then.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by babybemine (311 days ago)

Please save me a seat on that flight too!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Havefaith (311 days ago)

Yes, ofcourse. We will save a seat for Linlin as well. HF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Petie (311 days ago)

Thanks for the info SF07. I think we will be heading back to the dr after this cycle (I am CD 19 at the moment) so will ask him to put me on clomid. Is it pills?
Has any tried preseed? I don't think we can buy it here, looks like it is mail order only, might be worth a try!
Looking forward to us all being in first class on that flight off the island!
Petie
x

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by sunflower07 (311 days ago)

Hi babybemine, nice to meet you too. We are setting ourselves for some fancy journey I say! Better still if it is first class as Petie mentions. I am actually going away on a vaccation on Thursday. So looking forward to it. A good way to forget the two week wait.
Hey Petie, Clomid is pills and you take it from day 2 - 6. I have used KY, but it still hurts :( When you say you are CD 19, what do you mean by that? Good luck with Clomid. Some fall pregnant in the very first cycle. Hope it happens to you.
Hey Havefaith, thinking of you... SF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Havefaith (311 days ago)

SF,

How long are you going away for? Have a good vacation! I fly out next Wed and will be gone for 2 weeks - really looking forward to it.

First class would be nice! Any class on the earliest flight out would be fine with me.

Thanks for thinking about me - I am also including you in my prayers!

Take care, HF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by linlin123 (311 days ago)

Hi Havefaith,

Thank you for saving me a seat! This brand new thread looks very delightful and interesting. Wish you have nice trip next week and I hope every one of us in TTC will find our happiness soon after all the hardworks.

Lots of baby dusts to all

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (310 days ago)

hi girls,

am going to join this thread too. for those of you who saw my posting on the other thread, am in the 2WW after FET.

Am praying that this time round, things are positive.

sticky baby dust to all

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Havefaith (310 days ago)

Trying,

Lots of sticky baby dust to you and everyone!

HF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by 788 (310 days ago)

Hi All:

Jumping on the bandwagon too!! Have been trying for a while. Its really wonderful to have support and companions through this journey.

SF07, my obgyn in nyc told me not to use ky because it can change the pH. Haven't used preseed but was told to use egg whites.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by pinklotus (310 days ago)

hi all!

have been ttc'in for a while too. Hoping to start on a new cycle of IVF soon after my body recovers from my miscarriage recently.

Like 788.. its good to know there is support out there even though its in cyber-form.

wish everyone well with extra sticky baby dust.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by hkchoichoi (310 days ago)

Ladies -

I'm jumping in from TTC#2 thread - in case you're not checking that one - some foods to avoid while TTC and in the early months of pregnancy -

any foods with nitrates or nitrates in them as preservative. Most people think it's blowing it out of proportion as nitrates are often naturally occur in fruits and veggies - but there is a school of thought that believes them to be potentially harmful to fetal health.

http://www.americanbaby.com/ab/story.jhtml?page=5&catref=cat1880020&storyid=/templatedata/ab/story/data/9226.xml

this is a story which discounts the danger of nitrates - and keeps things with perspective. No need to be crazy intense about it - but you know, if you can avoid, why not.

(I am based in Unspecified)

Posted by babybemine (310 days ago)

Havefaith & SF, hope you get pg on holiday. You always hear stories about that happening so there must be some truth in it.

I'll be going to the docs soon to try a medicated IUI. Waiting for AF to arrive (any time now, so am feeling down in the dumps). SF, the routine you mentioned in your first post is becoming so familiar. The two week wait is just awful especially the last few days of it. Its hard to concentrate at work. This time last year, I didn't know anything about two week waits, OPKs or BBTs. And now I'm obsessed! I've stopped taking my temp everyday as it just seems to make me more worked up but still do it once in a while. It was useful to do it properly for a few months though and don't want to put others off. Doc told me the OPK is enough.

Enough griping. Got to stay positive.

Babydust to all.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by babybemine (310 days ago)

Oh yes, congrats SB2. Just great to hear your news!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Petie (310 days ago)

hi all,

It is so great to feel like I have people to 'talk' to about this. Only one friend knows we are TTC so it felt really lonely before.
CD19 means cycle day 19 - 8 to go until D-day!
Pinklotus - so sorry to hear about your miscarriage, that must be heartbreaking. Fingers crossed for the future.
What does everyone else think about egg whites? Seems a bit messy to me! I have heard that you shouldn't use KY though. Doesn't grapefruit juice give you more CM?
Babydust to all
Petie
x
SF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by sunflower07 (310 days ago)

Hi 788, thanks for letting me know about KY, supported by Petie about its negative effects. Good to know. It is funny though that you take clomid to enhance egg size and then the hostile mucus will not allow the swimmers to reach the egg.

I can't help feeling glad that there are so many 1st timers. In a world of easy babies, at least there is some bonhomie between the sufferers. This way it doesn't seem so bad hey?

Hey babybemine, thanks for your good wishes. I have been on at least 5 vaccations since I have been TTC and here I am singing my saga! It helps though and any good wishes always are always welcome. So thank you very much for that. I too was non-chalant and ate what I wanted, did what I felt like, didn't wait so anxiously and now that I know nature's games, I have become so damn obsessed. Sure ignorance is bliss!

Pink Lotus, I remember you from before. I am so sorry to hear of your miscarriage. How far along were you?

Good luck with your FET trying. What cycle are you on? Keep us informed for us to rejoice in your success. It is such a blissful thing to see that plus sign on the pee stick.

Oh! and we have the pleasure of HKchoichoi! yipeee....

Hey havefaith, I am going away to the UK, to Bath and Cornwall - my first time. I come back in a week's time and then you will be gone. Have a fantastic trip and eat loads of yummies and think of me - will ya?

Leaving on a jet plane...

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Havefaith (310 days ago)

SF,

I have you in my prayers - no worries. I love Bath - have fun and speak to you soon!

Take care + loads of babydust to you!

HF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by 788 (309 days ago)

You are welcome, sf07. Have a great time in UK. Petie, Egg whites turned out not to be too messy because you don't need much(or as messy as anything else) but it is certainly not romantic. In throes of passion, you say- Honey, get the eggs:) It really does sound as bad and you have to prepare a bit earlier. But you've gotta do what you've gotta do!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by pinklotus (309 days ago)

hi ladies

thanks Petie and SF07 for your wishes. I was 7 weeks into pregnancy when the doc did an ultrasound and found no heartbeat. The AF came couple of days later.. now.. i am just waiting for my body to readjust. Heading back to see Dr Ho this monday to have chat and see what my next steps will be.

For those going for holidays.. have loads of fun.. 2 of my sisters managed to conceive during their vacations before they were seriously thinking of embarking in the IVF route. So..its definitely possible to get preggo then.

Trying - how is your 2ww wait? I know its super hard and how anxious one can get. keep us posted.

as for egg white..i have never tried it..but heck.. its worth a go!

xx

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (309 days ago)

2WW SUCKS!!!!

I have totally convinced myself it wont work. I cant feel any symptoms apart from some small twinges which I am sure I am imagining.

I really wish I could just know for sure now. Sad part is the bloating. Not fun putting on weight in IVF.

But what the heck after we have our babies, we have our entire lives to look sexy again!!!

Another week to go for me to test.

Keep the faith..

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Starbucks2 (308 days ago)

Trying - if it helps at all I had NO symptoms this time. Last pregnancy (which didn't go to full term) I was really tired and sore breasts (which could have been from pre-period anyway) but this time nothing. Funny thing though, as soon as I found out (last Saturday), I am now exhausted all the time!! Still waiting for the morning sickness that I had last time but kind of hoping that it doesn't arrive! Best of luck for the next week of waiting.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by pinklotus (308 days ago)

trying... hang in there...its normal(?) to second guess every little symptoms or no symptoms as a sign of pregnancy or not a pregnancy. I think women on 2ww have this ability to drive themselves crazy..

i wish calmness..
xx

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (308 days ago)

hi all

i have been a reader of the fertility threads for a while. glad to see that someone is picking up this subject again. i think some of you have not tried for as long as me. its been 2 years. it has also been an emotional rollercoaster ride and a lonely journey. sucks that i am surrounded by so many pregnant women too. each time in a social gathering the question is always "so when will be your turn?" i am tired of just addressing that question. i have been told that stress plays a huge part in stopping one from conceiving. i don't know if anyone has this problem here but its definitely mine. anyway, sorry that i don't sound very cheerful. but i do wish everyone here to get what they want in the end.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (308 days ago)

trying, I think you've just taken the words out of my mouth. I'm also in the dreaded 2ww, except I now have 4 days more to go.

I'm driving myself nuts. I mean, I don't know why I get so worked up about it when I haven't been successful month after month anyway.....

I do not have any pregnancy symptoms either. Sometimes I think I see increased cervical mucus which is meant to be a sign of pregnancy but I had that last month and the month before and I wasn't pregnant. So....

Anyway I think I'm going crazy....

Good luck.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Petie (308 days ago)

I'm in the TWW club as well and agree that it is horrible! Everytime I feel sick or tired or have different CM... I get excited, only to be upset again at the end of it all. I have no symptoms at all so am really not holding out any hope. 1 more week to go. I am going on holiday at the end of August so hopefully that will help with our stress levels.
Espresso, I know what you mean about people always asking when it will be your turn. I was at a party the other weekend and actually had someone take me aside and lecture me that I really should start trying soon otherwise I'll regret not having children when I'm older. I could have punched her!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by pinklotus (308 days ago)

espresso.. i am sorry that you feel this way but you are not alone. I too have been TTCing for about 2 years. It is very frustrating. I feel obsessed, depressed, happy, sad,up and down all within one second. It also does not help that Discovery Channel or Nat Geog showed documentaries on "in the womb series
" etc. I still whince and switch channel when that programme is on.

All i can say to myself that the situation could be worse (and perhaps we have been thru the worst) and if I just hang on a little longer something good will turn up.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (307 days ago)

Hi girls,

OK now i still have 7 days to go officially until i test but i know i will test on wednesday so i actually have 5.

I have a question. Lets say for all of us who are struggling with this TTC thingy - if you had the option of moving to a totally new place with an adopted baby so no one would ask you any strange questions - would it make your decision to adopt easier?

Dont know but am trying to understand myself and my subconscious ie whether I am running away from adoption because I really want my own ONLY or because I am afraid of what the world will say.

And if the answer is it would then why not adopt a MAKE ONE TAKE ONE principal?

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (307 days ago)

trying

i think the answer is yes to the extent that it will make it easier on the kid in the long run. that way, at least you can choose to keep it a private matter within your family. and the kid can grow up not thinking that he/she is different from everyone. but it would seem that there are a lot of other issues to consider. good luck with that.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by babybemine (305 days ago)

Petie, Trying, MayC, do try and think lots of positive thoughts for now, however hard that is. Very best wishes.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by linlin123 (305 days ago)

Hi trying,

Same here, I have been thinking about adoptions or just giving up this whole " baby making project" during my time of depression.

I found myself easier by telling myself and others about giving up the plan, rather than having an adoption. For me, having & raising a child is not an easy thing... there will be a "big package" of responsibilities to bear thru our lifetime. so I am not ready to adopt but prefer to have my own one if possible, or just forget about the whole ttc.

I know it's very hard for you while trying your second attempt of IVF. You have such encouragement to go thru the process again with lots of emotional & financial contributions. As Havefaith said, after all the hardworks, please try to be calm. cause you already have gone this far, so please don't give up! The chinese dr told me that any stress and anxiety will affect directly to the ttc result (blood flow will diminishes to uterus and the muscles will be tighten, bad for conception & implantation)... so pleeeeeaaase relax during your 2ww and for sure you will give us great news soon!

Linlin

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (305 days ago)

hi all,

am still struggling thru the 2WW. Some abdominal twinges still and today some feelings of AF. Am terrified of seeing AF appear. I am normally a very strong person but sometimes I get uncontrollably angry with this sigtuation.

BUT let me tell you all something. Today an acquaintance told me she has been diagnosed with breast cancer. And when i heard that it immediately put things in perspective.

EVEN IF i am not pregnant, I am alive and healthy and i really couldnt ask god for more.

SO - lets keep trying without any expectations. If it happens - great if not we are no worse off.

Keep the faith

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Pauleen (305 days ago)

Trying - you are absolutely right. I have been ttc for 3 years and just had a miscarriage at 7 weeks, 3 weeks ago after 2nd ivf attempt. In the process of getting my body right for transfer # 3! It is exhausting at times, but while we still have 5 frozen embryos there is still hope for us to keep trying.
Hope and faith to everyone out there!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by KAT8 (304 days ago)

Trying, there is no shame about adoption. Why do you have to move to a new place etc???

I know what you are going through. I was trying for 3 years to get pregnant, finally we
decided to adopt and now my son is 10 years old.

I also wanted to give ivf one go (I have endometriosis) and we were very lucky, we put in three embroys and one stuck. My daughter is now seven years old.

I think one of the reason the ivf was successful was that I wasn't very stressed. If the ivf hadn't worked I wouldn't have been devastated as I had my son already.

I love both of my kids very much, to me (and to their father) there is no difference between them. They are our children regardless of one being adopted and the other biological.

I wish you good luck in whatever you decide to do.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by babybemine (304 days ago)

Pauline, sorry to hear about your miscarriage after all you have gone through. So glad that you have frozen embryos and hope you find the right solution to putting them back in.

As for me, I'm starting the Robitussin, thinking positive thoughts and aim to avoid all types of stress as we prepare to BD like there is no tommorrow?!? Hee Hee...

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by pinklotus (304 days ago)

hi Pauleen

sorry to hear abt the miscarriage ..it must had been very agonizing then. i wish you well and hope that the embies will find a safe and happy route back to HK and to you.

babybemine - good on you!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (304 days ago)

Pauleen, I'm so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. Fingers crossed, I hope it's third time lucky for you.

Trying, I think for me, if would make the decision to adopt easier if I was moving where no one knew about it. If people knew, I would worry not so much about what people would say to me but to my child. I'd rather such news stay within our family. Trying, good luck for tomorrow. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Petie, good luck too. I think you will be testing soon, right? ;-)

Babybemine, your plan sounds like a very good one. Have fun BD-ing.

Pinklotus, how did your appointment with Dr Ho go?

Espresso, I hope you are feeling much better this week. This whole TTC thing is quite depressing.... we get hopeful each month only to be crushed again. It's okay when you're only at it for a few months... but then when it's bad news month after month, it is VERY hard to keep strong. But a woman's body is complicated and very different internally from one another. You just never know. When I had my first, I didn't believe I could carry a baby inside me until she came out and I saw her for myself. The working of a woman's body is truly a miracle!

Now where am I up to? Well, I tested yesterday, a day before my expected AF and I got a negative. Then I went out to buy myself a BBT. I tested at 3am this morning and the reading was 36.53 Celcius. It's quite low and I'm not surprised if AF is around the corner. How do I read it anyway? I'll probably get it later today or tomorrow.

The HK heat is killing me. Is it me or is this the hottest summer we've had for a long time? Well, in the six years I've been here anyway ;-)

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (304 days ago)

pauleen-sorry for your loss. getting your health back is absolutely top priority now!

mayC- thats why i say its a test of faith and perseverence! sometimes i ask myself, how far am i willing to go? quit my job? stay home? move away?

trying- thanks for your message as it really helped. right now all of us are just so focussed on having a baby and naturally you just let it run your life. unfortunately you don't have ultimate control whether you want to be a mother or not.

KAT8- i hear you when you say that it helped you to conceive when you were not stressed. i am seriously convinced that my stress is killing me & stopping me from having a baby. i think i am approaching a crossroad where i have to choose between a career and a baby.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (304 days ago)

Kat8,

thanks for your story. it is inspiring. i agree that adoption is nothing to be ashamed of but my problem is that i think i could not handle it if people felt pity for me as in "the poor thing - she cant have her own".

anyway the q was more theoretical to understand my own thought process.

Espresso - i can also relate to your being at a crossroad feeling. I have the same feeling. My job is very demanding and to be honest right now all i care about is my conception.

Ok so for me another day in the terrible 2WW is gone by. Again today i had terrible PMS feelings most of the day. Anyway i am testing tomorrow morning to get it over with. official test day is friday but i am convinced that by tomorrow whatever it is will be final.

Finding it hard right now to say but anyway KEEP THE FAITH.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by pinklotus (303 days ago)

trying

good luck with the test tomorrow..wish you all the best.

MayC- Dr Ho recommended me to have a fresh cycle of IVF instead fo IUI with meds. Thus - i will be resting this cycle but continuing with TCM. Fingers cross- i will be proceed with IVF next month or so.

good luck everyone

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (303 days ago)

trying - good luck testing today. whatever happens,we are always here to lend an ear. as for me, DH and I have had a chat about the situation already. we are trying to put a time line to TTC and i am contemplating quitting my job early next year if i still don't get pregnant by end of year. just to see if a change in lifestyle may help. i haven't made up my mind yet though. but does that sound crazy at all?

pinklotus - i have not started with TCM but i may do for future reference. i know it has been said that TCM may help to boost fertility and same with accupunture. DH is against accupuncture so i most likely won't be doing it. for now anyway.

my official 2WW started today after my IUI.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by babybemine (303 days ago)

MayC, 36.5 seems a bit low but a single temperature does not mean much plus you did it at 3am.

Tips on BBT: do it as soon as you wake up every morning, preferably around the same time. The temps after ovulation are all generally higher but you still may get the odd temp drop after ovulating but don't panic. If the pattern is low in the first half and high in the second half, then you are ovulating. Sometimes the temps are still a little high in the first couple of days of AF. Higher temps or gradually rising temps a few days before the end of your cycle don't always mean you are PG. I've noticed i usually get a bit of a decline the day before expected AF. I know then that I'm probably not PG but I did it for a few months in a row so got to know my usual temp ranges. A glass of wine the evening before can give you a high temp.

Really hope AF doesn't show up for you. Fingers crossed.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (303 days ago)

Thanks for the BBT tips, babybemine. Problem is, I know they say I need at least 3 hours of sleep before taking the temperature. However, I get up automatically around 3am (sometimes 4am) and I don't usually sleep well until 7.30am (the time I'm supposed to wake up each morning). So can I go by my temp at 3am if I take it around that time daily?

I'm not so hopeful this cycle because my BBT seems low and I got a negative on my HPT. However, today's the day AFTER I got my period and it still hasn't shown!!! Could this cycle be it? Or is it false alarm? I may have miscalculated my dates too because I only mentally took notes of it (eg. I think I said I was supposed to "O" on the 2nd and period 15 days later) but I'm not too sure.

I've lost count of the number of times I've been to the loo just to see if AF is here. My emotions are just going everywhere now.... but if I'm not successful, I would be crushed. Then again, it's not like the first time I've been disappointed so I don't know why I'm so worked up over it....

It's just that this time, it's a day late or whatever and it would have given me a false hope that I may not be able to deal with....

I'm wearing a pantyliner and I have my panadols on my desk in front of me... just in case I get hit with awful period cramps from my endometriosis.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by babybemine (303 days ago)

Oooh, MayC....really hope this is it for you...One BBT reading at 3am means nothing. Sadly, I have no experience with pregnancy tests....

I think most of us would be going crazy so its not just you. Hang in there. Maybe you could test tomorrow if AF doesn't show?

Tons of babydust...

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (303 days ago)

Pinklotus, good luck in your ivf next month okay? Now's the best time to get your body ready for it. If you read my posts on TTC #2, I have listed some ideas on how to improve our health. Flaxseed, evening primrose oil, grapefruit juice.....

trying, have you tested yet?

espresso and trying, I find it REALLY hard to concentrate on work also. I've been spending a lot of time reading up on a book hkchoichoi recommended. It's called, "Taking Charge of Your Fertility". I think that book's great. It's a very difficult book to read but anytime I need answers, I just have to flip the book and I'll get my answers. It tells me so much about my body that I didn't know....

So if this cycle doesn't work for me, I will attempt charting my BBT, buy myself evening primrose (pre-ovulation use) + flaxseed (post-ovulation use) and I will go visit a Chinese dr for some herbs. I will need to purchase an OPK again because if I get my period this cycle, it means I've stuffed up my calculation. Much to my hubby's dismay, he's going to have to start drinking Korean Red Ginseng again to improve HIS fertility ;-)

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (303 days ago)

Thanks, babybemine for your baby dusts.. Please keep your fingers and toes crossed for me. I shall be forever grateful :-)

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Havefaith (303 days ago)

Dear All,

I have often heard our experience here is a bit like a rollercoaster ride. I have really experienced that in the past 5 days. On Sat morning (Day 29 of the cycle), I went to the doc's clinic for a pregnancy test with full expectation of a -ve. However, in order to prepare for a two-week holiday I needed to know for sure - before I had sushi, hot yoga, facials, hair perm, etc. I found out Sat afternoon afternoon that it was a +ve. However, it was low beta count. I was advised that because the pregnancy resulted from a natural IUI cycle low beta is not uncommon but the real test would be the second test to see whether it was raising. Yesterday afternoon, I found out that my Beta level has fallen and doc's prediction is that my AF will come in the next couple of days.

I am waiting for takeoff (for our two weeks vacation) at the lounge and just had a BIG plate of smoked salmon.

Good luck to everyone who is in the 2ww. Lots of baby dust to you.

HF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by lovechild (303 days ago)

Hi Havefaith,
Sorry to hear about the low beta count,but i have a feeling that you are close to getting a +ve.So go on your holiday without any worries as your circle of friends will be here praying for you and hearing you outjust as you provide support to all of us.I myself just got back from 2 weeks out and the first thing i get to know is that one of my colleagues is pregnant.It was very hard for me ,after some tears and talking to my best friend in the US ,i feel a lot better.

And as someone mentioned earlier on your Acronym(havefaith)already gives faith.....I hope you have a grat time and most importantly enjoy yourself.I just got back from visiting my sister and her 1 year old daughter and got a good wake up call in how much work is involved in raising a child.Not that i would have it or not have it any other way.What i'm saying is enjoy THIS moment and time as it won't come back.

LC

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (303 days ago)

Oh Havefaith, I'm so sooooooo sorry. I've been following your story and to hear such news really breaks my heart.

Lovechild is right... enjoy your holiday now because when you come back and when you succeed in your pregnancy (which I'm sure you will), you won't have time.

We'll be here waiting for you to write...

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Starbucks2 (303 days ago)

Havefaith - poor you having positive news and then negative. This is such the way of TTC'ing - the ups and downs of it all. As LC says, we will all be hoping that you have a fab time away and try and relax.

SB2

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by babybemine (303 days ago)

Havefaith, my heart is breaking for you too, but I'm also convinced you're going to hit the jackpot soon. Lots of hugs to you.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (303 days ago)

havefaith - sad to hear the news but i hope you can stay strong. i am trying to stay strong too. remember that this can be a long journey. most importantly, you owe to yourself the enjoyment of a good vacation right now!

lovechild - in the last month, i have learn that four people are pregnant. it surely gets unbearable at times. i am happy for them but at the same time sad for myself. you know, this morning when i had my IUI, i cant help but think a million things, like, is this meant to be? is it for me? or is my destiny calling for me to focus on other things in life other than being a mom? is God trying to send me a message?or like what is wrong with me?

obviously i did not have any answers to those questions. i suppose in due course what i need to know i will find out eventually.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by KAT8 (303 days ago)

trying, trust me when I say nobody will think less of you should you decide to adopt one day.

espresso, I still remember when my best friend told me she was pregnant, I was devastated as she didn't even want kids at that time in her life. Like you I asked so many questions, to which there was no answer. However in life you dry your tears and get on with it.

Good luck to all the ladies in this thread on your journeys to becoming a mother.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by blessed (303 days ago)

Hi All,

I've been following this thread and really feel for all of you. Whatever you do, don't lose hope. As I was told at one stage, every woman's body is created to carry a baby and your time will come.

Havefaith - I'm so sorry about the -ve beta but at least you can fly out of the HK heat! I have a feeling you're almost there. You'll come back rejuvenated and ready to go. Have a great time!

SB2 - Congrats to you and don't stress out. BTW, are you seeing Dr Ho? Coz I read on the TTC#2 thread that you said your doc was due to go on hols soon and I'm supposed to see him next week for my NT scan!

espresso - take it easy! Think positive images and thoughts. Try staying out of the heat and spend more time lying down for the next 3 days. I know zillions of questions will pass your mind but don't dwell on it too much coz you'll only stress yourself out.

I'm doing OK. Just went to Tsan Yuk today to register with the government hospital, recommended by a friend, to use their prenatal services etc. but there's a very slim chance I'll be giving birth there (unless DH goes bankrupt in the next 6mths). The heat here is really getting to me and I wish I could just hop on a plane and fly home to Sydney where it's 9 degs!!

Baby dust to you all and whatever stage you're at on this road, keep your chin up and be positive!

blessed

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by linlin123 (303 days ago)

Hi Havefaith, I am sorry about your test result, but hopefully there is a miracle happening to you during your happy holidays. Enjoy your time and keep us updated when you are back.

Blessed, so happy to hear from you again. From the news it seems not easy to book either private or public hospitals for delivery, is that true? I hope you could find the right hospital for you to deliver a healthy baby.

Trying, I totally understand your mix feelings in your 2ww. It's not a bad idea to start planning for adoption, but the planning should be helpful to your 2ww like a good distraction, not a bad one to make you even more stressful. Hopefully you can live one day at a time, nice and easy.

About me, I was thinking seriously whether I should start my 2nd IVF this month, after seeing dr Tay last week... I guess I am not yet recovered emotionally from the last failure. because I can cry easily anytime anywhere when seeing someone carrying nice beautiful "belly" , or just have a pretty little babies on hand. Wake up in the morning and find no meaning of living, etc. My stupid head is having so much negative feelings that I wanted to shut down myself from outside world.

Good thing my DH is trying to pull me back to reality and trying to keep me busy with functions and friends. I really hope I can have my inner part healling soon, so I can start everything all over again.

Wish you girls are strong and be positive. Good luck!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (303 days ago)

Havefaith - Chin up. Things will get better soon. Dont worry. Have a good holiday.

Ok i have a confession girls (pls dont laugh at me). I tested this morning and i cant decide whether i saw a faint line or whether it was a shadow.

I think it was really really faint but now i have convinced myself it was a shadow and nothing to get excited about...

may be i will test again tomorrow. am so stupid arent I?

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (303 days ago)

Havefaith - Chin up. Things will get better soon. Dont worry. Have a good holiday.

Ok i have a confession girls (pls dont laugh at me). I tested this morning and i cant decide whether i saw a faint line or whether it was a shadow.

I think it was really really faint but now i have convinced myself it was a shadow and nothing to get excited about...

may be i will test again tomorrow. am so stupid arent I?

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (302 days ago)

kat8 - you are so right. we all just to have keep moving on. this is what life is about. my tears are dried now and i think i am getting better at taking pain/disappointment.
linlin-i know you are down in the dumps right now. look on the bright side - at least your DH is being supportive.
trying-there is no judging here! i would say just to do it again tomorrow, hoping for a clearer result. good luck.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by 788 (302 days ago)

Hi Havefaith, So sorry to hear about your -ve beta testing. But look at the positive side- you got a +ve result with a natural IUI, thats certainly something to go hmmm... I wonder if that gives the doc any clues on what to do next time. For the time being- relax and enjoy your vacation.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (302 days ago)

trying, that's excellent!! I hope your test tomorrow will confirm it for you. They do say a positive is a positive, no matter how faint the line is!!!

I haven't got my period yet, fingers crossed. However, I tested again last night and it was a negative. I tried to look at it at ALL angles and with different kinds of lights.. and had to admit to myself that it was a very clear negative.

So it's either I tested too early or I'm not pregnant. I'm a bit worried too because I have a dull ache in my stomach since 2 weeks ago. I pray that it's nothing.

You know, I've been pigging out on half cooked steaks so I'm a bit worried if I am pregnant. I spent far too long avoiding these foods so when I was diagnosed with endo, I kind of gave up a little and ate raw foods.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by linlin123 (302 days ago)

trying, what a great news. As MayC said, a positive is a positive... hopefully everything works out for you this time.

espresso, thanks for your kind words. I guess I just have to learn how to appreciate who and what we have now, and not to force the unreachable.

MayC, I am also on my 2ww (natural cycle)and no sign of period yet. Tested this morning and it was -ve. As this is my 1st natural cycle after last ivf, it could be irregular due to the previous hormone shots. Anyway, I will continue the testing until AF comes. Good luck to your next testing.

As my inner condition is still very unstable, I just decided to apply some easy evening classes to keep me going. I hope I can be more happy by learning some new stuff besides purely ttc in my head.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by lovechild (302 days ago)

This is so nice that so many of us are either testing for answers or in the 2ww together.I am praying for all of us ,Trying,Linlin123,Mayc,and of cousre Dear Havefaith!Hang in there.As we always keep telling each other we are there to hear each other out.

Like Espresso said earlier,even if go through the pain and the tears dry out we seem to be ready again,That's the imp.thing.So baby dust to all !

I am currently ovulating so not in the waiting period ,yet.Hopefully ,a miracle happens to us soon!

LC

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Starbucks2 (302 days ago)

Hi all

Well, went to the specialist today (same one as last time) and was so so nervous. He was excited for me which was a good start. Had the ultrasound while I lay there tense as and he said he could see the pregnancy sack and a very small heart beat so I was very pleased for 5 and a half weeks along (had not expected to see a heart beat). Fingers crossed that the little mite stays in there safe and sound.

SB2

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (302 days ago)

SB2,

Great news. Keeping my fingers crossed for you. Dont worry things will be fine.

On my side, I tested again today and again and (dare i say) i still thought I saw a faint "+" on clear blue. My question is - if u can make out a + at arms length it could real? or still shadow??

not sure right now and since hubby was traveling until today it was me alone and I truely dont trust myself on this. Tomorrow i will show him my result and if he sees the "+" i am going to get a blood test done to confirm.

this is just so difficult. The only thing that is keeping me going is that this is better than not having been in doubt about a BFN.

Tomorrow is the day!!! pls pray for me

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (302 days ago)

trying - best of luck to you!!! i really hope that you get what you want!!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (301 days ago)

Hi all,
I'm at work to tie up some loose ends but will be heading home soon - sick leave.
But I just wanted to write to let you girls know that it wasn't meant to be.
Last night, while taking my daughter to Mannings, I felt something leak and knew instantly that my period had arrived (albeit 2 days late).
I did say that if it's going to arrive, better early than late so that I don't get my hopes up.
Surprisingly I took it really well.
It was too good to be true... but at least I had a day or two pretending to be pregnant eventhough I wasn't. Oh well.....back to the drawing board....
Trying, good luck. Hopefully you'll get better news than me....

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (301 days ago)

mayC - i am sorry. i know how it feels. hang in there. one way or the other, we will get there one of these days.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by lovechild (301 days ago)

Dear Dear Mayc,
Please don't feel bad,like so many of us go through there are so many solutions to every challenge one faces.And not that you need to be reminded you HAVE age ,your positive spirit,and NOTHING will come in the way of that.

So,just relax and enjoy the rest of the day off!!

Lots of love and hugs,
LC

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Petie (301 days ago)

MayC - So sorry, I only too well how you feel at the moment.
trying - my fingers and toes are crossed for you!
I got AF a couple of days ago so we are starting to think about plan B now. Think we will go to the Dr this cycle and see what we can do next.
Can anyone give me the costs of IVF and IUI? Would be good to start preparing for the shock!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (301 days ago)

petie

depending on where you go - i am sure the fees will vary. IUI-the procedure alone at dr ho's costs 6k. there are also other fees involved, for instance, the medication - one cycle of puregon is 3k. i needed two, so it was 6k total. yes the costs do add up. so you should do more research to see what other choices are out there. i am sure there are other drs who are also good but with more reasonable fees. i had IUI done with another dr (dr joseph chan - OB/GYN) but i liked dr ho better. good luck!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Starbucks2 (301 days ago)

MayC - sorry to hear that AF arrived. Please don't lose hope as we all have our fingers crossed for you and the other TTC'ers.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (301 days ago)

girls,

Official update!! got tested this morning and while the result is positive, the doc said the beta number is a bit low.

Its currently at 14 and he expects it to have hit the 50 mark by today.

so he said its not a totally lost cause but he is less hopeful.

i am at a loss for any feeling right now - good or bad.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Petie (300 days ago)

Trying - congrats on the BFP! Fingers crossed for you that everything goes well now, don't get too stressed (not easy, I'm sure!). Keep us updated...you are the first one off the island!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Havefaith (298 days ago)

Trying,

I have my fingers crossed for you. Keep calm and dont worry too much!

HF

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (298 days ago)

trying- i am keeping my fingers crossed for you too. by the way - what does a low beta number mean?

for me i am into my day 5 in the 2WW. nurse says that i can start doing preg test next sat. not entirely sure if i want to do it - after months of disappointment. i was also trying to do some research over the weekend to see if there are any recognised early pregnancy symptoms... guess i may be becoming a little obsessed!!

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by trying (298 days ago)

all,

its essentially over for me this cycle. Tested again yesterday and the test showed a nagative. So i panicked and called the doc. he told me it means that I has what they term as missed abortion.

I am heart broken. BUT i wont let this get me down. As DH said, this is one step away from my goal. So may be next time I will get there.

Going at noon today for more tests and then to work on next steps.

AF hasnt arrived yet but i am not keeping any hopes at all on this cycle.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Petie (298 days ago)

Oh Trying, I am so sorry. What a horrible thing to happen. Try to be strong and keep this experience as a sign that you CAN get pregnant.
Hope everything goes ok at the doctor's abd they can give you more info about it.
espresso, how is everything feeling? This is an IUI cycle, right? I have an HSG this week, not looking forward to it, after that might do IUI.

Petie
x

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by pinklotus (298 days ago)

Dearest Trying

very sorry to hear what happened.Have a good cry if you need to and you are right to say that you would not let this cycle dampen your spirits! I wish you well.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by MayC (298 days ago)

Oh Trying..... I'm so, so sorry....I am at a lost at why things like this happens. We've tried so hard and when we get a positive, we think, "This is it" and then it turns out not to be.... how can we be so close yet so far?

I don't get it though. I mean, do treatments increase the risks of miscarriage? Can someone enlighten me on this? Do the MAJORITY who succeed getting pregnant with treatment STAY pregnant all throughout? Please say yes because I'm in the brink of losing hope... with my emotions going everywhere. I was in tears last night too asking hubby to convince me that I will have a baby again.

You know, the 2 days my period was late, I was convinced I was pregnant so I went and bought myself a maternity top from Bossini. Then as I was walking home, I felt the "leak" and I knew it was the end of my dreams for the month. I didn't take it bad... perhaps I was trying to be strong until yesterday. I didn't tell hubby my period was late but he "knew" because I told him when I was expecting it a week ago. He was hopeful too but didn't tell me. When I told him my period had arrived, he was disappointed. I thought it a bit strange that his response was so sad compared to previously. Now I know it was because he had hoped the way I did.

A friend of ours has just given birth too. I've lost count at how many births we've had in our group of friends since last year.

Trying, I know it must be hard for you but have faith. Because this means that you're on the right track and you will get pregnant again.

At the moment, for me, I guess life goes on.... and another cycle to tackle.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by espresso (298 days ago)

trying-i am so sorry. chin up and try to stay strong. as they say, "if there is a will there is a way..."