guy SMS another guy too much

Posted by eaurhb (233 days ago)

My husband (American, if it matters) has a friend (also an American) who likes to text him so much. Basically telling my husband how he feels or what he encounters during the day. He also emails my husband on some jokes (which he forwarded to me sometimes) and not sure if something else also.

I feel it is just strange that a guy will like to keep such a close contact or like to share so much with another guy. My husband however does not seem to SMS so much to him though. His friend does not seem to be gay because I heard that he has girlfriends but kind of come and go type.

Any comment on such behaviour ? Thanks.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

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Posted by tigerbay (233 days ago)

As a guy, my guess - Male bonding.

Even though I am married I get lonely and need the company of other guys. It could be your husbands friend has a girlfriend, but she doesn't share certain cultural values. So your husband is an outlet for that need.

(I am based in Shanghai)

Posted by candywang (233 days ago)

I don't think it is abnormal. Just like we woman likes to chat with our close friends.Man also needs to communicate to others.

(I am based in Shanghai)

Posted by Little Carmen (233 days ago)

Hell, I sms my female friend a fair bit, does that make me gay? What does it matter if this guy sms' your husband a lot, question is, would you feel better if it was a female colleague doing this? I think more than anything you ought to question why you feel threatened or insecure about something rather outlandish since we are talking about the man you are married to! Unless you think your husband is gay, it doesnt really matter who sms' him, right? I mean, do you feel this friend of his is taking away attention from you?

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by purplelady (233 days ago)

Sounds pretty normal to me in this modern world!!!

(I am based in Shanghai)

Posted by FKKC (233 days ago)

He even e-mails to you - that means it's totally open so what is there to be afraid of? Guess this friend just wanted to communicate with people that have the same level of thoughts as him to balance up his day.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by eaurhb (233 days ago)

I do not think man likes to chat so much with man. Women like to pick up a phone and talk a lot. I seldom see man picks up a phone and chat a lot with another man. I do not feel insecure as my husband does not need to sms him that many times. He would rather share his things with me. But sometimes this guy was in overseas, which is in another time zone and sms my husband, the phone then keep beeping in the middle of the night until he reads the sms, it is more annoying. I just feel his friend is pathetic, perhaps no friend to share or as tigerbay said. Also, I think my husband and his friend are kind of person that likes to complain so much. So they share the same value.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by Little Carmen (233 days ago)

Well, me thinks regardless of your husbands friend being "pathetic"...your hubby ought to either keep his phone on silent or turn it off when he is going to bed if he knows its bothering you. If you havent told him, then he doesnt know...men are not mind readers.

(I am based in Hong Kong)

Posted by lookforjames (232 days ago)

I would agree with Little Carmen (as I am a man myself,,,,and it is true "we are not" mind-readers"). Tell your husband that he shud put his phone on silent during the late evening...or tell him to tell his FRIEND, not to be texting you so late in the evenings, unless it's a dire emergency.

(I am based in Guangzhou)